Image
File
fipril 7, 2004
Opinions ¢ the other press ©
Dear Telus: What A &
Tangled Web We Weave
LIKE WORKING
WITH PEOPLE?
yo ee
CT RING
x fo
oe
Do you have a 3.0
average and desire
to help other students
do well in their courses?
Do you want to work
ina dynamic, flexible
environment that is
in the same building
as your classes?
Ted Morrison
OP. Contributor
Well, well, well, me hearties. Let's
sum up the action taken on Telus so
far.
November 2003: I ask the Telus
online directory for all entries in
their category “Musical Instrument
Shops” within 200km of Vancouver.
The directory responds, informing
me that there are none. I beg to dif-
fer, in writing, to the complaints
department via the email link on
Telus’ own web page.
November 2003 + a day or two:
Into my inbox comes my complaint
letter to Telus—not answered, but
bounced. That is, the complaint let-
ter I sent Telus, from a Telus page,
was bounced by a Telus server as
“address unrecognized.” I laugh hol-
lowly and write the first “Dear
Telus” piece.
January 2004: Upon my arrival
home from Xmas holidays, I discov-
er that the chairman of Telus has
included in the envelope containing
my monthly bill, a sincere letter, full
of shame and pain, about the lousy
service Telus customers have been
receiving. Feeling Mr. Entwistle’s
pain, I write hima letter explaining
that he can expiate his guilt by sim-
ply returning $63 (about one
month's worth of my phone bill) to
me at the above address, and thank-
ing him for the depth and sincerity
of his contrition. This experience I
incorporate into “Dear Telus”
episode II.
February 2004: Mr. Entwistle has
a friendly fellow from the Telus head
office call me. This nice guy explains
how they'd love to refund my
dough, but it’s illegal, due to regula-
tions put in place by Big Brother—I
mean the CRTC.
About the same time: I write to
the CRTC to let them know their
foul ruse has been discovered. A very
nice lady writes me back the follow-
ing day, asking for clarification.
After explaining the situation in
complete and utter honesty (I’m
asking for a refund not because my
service has been any shittier than the
usual Telus standard, but because
they say they're so very sorry with-
out really meaning it), I get a mes-
sage from the CRTC stating that
there is no reason why Telus cannot
issue me a refund “for any amount,
including $63” or for any reason.
This information is loyally compiled
into “Dear Telus” mark III.
March 2004: I write back to Mr.
Entwistle, asking him to quote me
the chapter and verse wherein the
bad ol’ CRTC says I can’t have my
refund—which brings us to the
most recent happening. On March
18 I got a phone message from one
Bonnie Anderson at Telus corporate
HQ. Ms. Anderson, understandably
not familiar with my case, apparent-
ly read my letter and concluded,
“Tm not sure what you're asking
for.”
It’s like this, Ms. A: I am asking
for my $63 back. Failing that, I
want you to show me where it is
written down that Telus cannot,
nay—must not, give me this refund.
I placed a call to the Alberta head-
quarters of Telus today—but it turns
out Ms. A only gets in at 10am. So I
left a message. Privately I’ve decided
that if they stall me again this time,
I will up my demand to $126. That's
a lot less than the value of the time
I’ve wasted being jerked around by
Telus.
It’s now 9:30 am BC time—10:30
am Telus (AB) time. Obviously Ms.
Anderson must be fairly high up in
Telus, because she’s not exactly get-
ting a wiggle on to get back to little
ol’ me, is she? Actually—ir’s now
llam two days later—I’ve aged a
year in the interval (my birthday was
Monday). I’ve left a new message
telling Ms. A. that she can call me
tomorrow whenever she gets in.
Thursday March 25: Triumph! I
have conquered the monster Telus
Corporation!
Having not heard back from Ms.
Anderson in several days I called
again today. She answered her own
phone. I explained exactly what had
taken place, and quoted the words
of the Telus rep I'd talked to earlier,
“It would be illegal” to refund me
my $63. Instead of temporizing,
Ms. Anderson responded with, “It
isn't, of course. That person total-
yan
In a warm rush of good feeling, I
spared her having to say, “lied.” Ms.
Anderson explained that I was not
entitled to a refund for defective
service (which I have admitted
before). I stated that I did not seek
the refund for that reason—I just
wanted Darren Entwistle to return
one twelfth of the $756 I was
charged for what the “president,
CEO, and proud member of the
Telus team” himself called “substan-
dard service” over the last year.
“Each customer has to be looked
at as an individual,” I was told
(which I assume is code for “the
squeaky wheel gets the grease”). Ms.
Anderson has said that she will
refund my money by the goodwill
credit mechanism—built into Telus
for exactly these sorts of cases. The
$63 will be subtracted from my next
bill. It truly restores my faith in the
company to know that basically, any
sufficiently pissed-off customer can
get their money back from Telus at
Telus’ discretion. Provided they're
willing to write a few letters.
Will there be a fifth “Dear Telus”
installment? I get my next bill
around the April 10. I'd ding them
for the time I’ve spent being talked
to, and sometimes grossly lied to, by
them, for the time writing to the
CRTC, and for the hours I spent
writing letters and OP pieces. But
$63 is 36 beers. What the hell, it’s a
victory, and for the most part—it’s
been fun!
Apply now at
Centre for more
information.
Come tutor at the
LEARNING
CENTRE!
We are looking for people like
you to join our team
for the Summer
Semester starting in May.
www.workopoliscampus.com,
and come by The Learning
YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!
bf of"
http://www.otherpress.ca ¢ Page 9
Edited Text
fipril 7, 2004
Opinions ¢ the other press ©
Dear Telus: What A &
Tangled Web We Weave
LIKE WORKING
WITH PEOPLE?
yo ee
CT RING
x fo
oe
Do you have a 3.0
average and desire
to help other students
do well in their courses?
Do you want to work
ina dynamic, flexible
environment that is
in the same building
as your classes?
Ted Morrison
OP. Contributor
Well, well, well, me hearties. Let's
sum up the action taken on Telus so
far.
November 2003: I ask the Telus
online directory for all entries in
their category “Musical Instrument
Shops” within 200km of Vancouver.
The directory responds, informing
me that there are none. I beg to dif-
fer, in writing, to the complaints
department via the email link on
Telus’ own web page.
November 2003 + a day or two:
Into my inbox comes my complaint
letter to Telus—not answered, but
bounced. That is, the complaint let-
ter I sent Telus, from a Telus page,
was bounced by a Telus server as
“address unrecognized.” I laugh hol-
lowly and write the first “Dear
Telus” piece.
January 2004: Upon my arrival
home from Xmas holidays, I discov-
er that the chairman of Telus has
included in the envelope containing
my monthly bill, a sincere letter, full
of shame and pain, about the lousy
service Telus customers have been
receiving. Feeling Mr. Entwistle’s
pain, I write hima letter explaining
that he can expiate his guilt by sim-
ply returning $63 (about one
month's worth of my phone bill) to
me at the above address, and thank-
ing him for the depth and sincerity
of his contrition. This experience I
incorporate into “Dear Telus”
episode II.
February 2004: Mr. Entwistle has
a friendly fellow from the Telus head
office call me. This nice guy explains
how they'd love to refund my
dough, but it’s illegal, due to regula-
tions put in place by Big Brother—I
mean the CRTC.
About the same time: I write to
the CRTC to let them know their
foul ruse has been discovered. A very
nice lady writes me back the follow-
ing day, asking for clarification.
After explaining the situation in
complete and utter honesty (I’m
asking for a refund not because my
service has been any shittier than the
usual Telus standard, but because
they say they're so very sorry with-
out really meaning it), I get a mes-
sage from the CRTC stating that
there is no reason why Telus cannot
issue me a refund “for any amount,
including $63” or for any reason.
This information is loyally compiled
into “Dear Telus” mark III.
March 2004: I write back to Mr.
Entwistle, asking him to quote me
the chapter and verse wherein the
bad ol’ CRTC says I can’t have my
refund—which brings us to the
most recent happening. On March
18 I got a phone message from one
Bonnie Anderson at Telus corporate
HQ. Ms. Anderson, understandably
not familiar with my case, apparent-
ly read my letter and concluded,
“Tm not sure what you're asking
for.”
It’s like this, Ms. A: I am asking
for my $63 back. Failing that, I
want you to show me where it is
written down that Telus cannot,
nay—must not, give me this refund.
I placed a call to the Alberta head-
quarters of Telus today—but it turns
out Ms. A only gets in at 10am. So I
left a message. Privately I’ve decided
that if they stall me again this time,
I will up my demand to $126. That's
a lot less than the value of the time
I’ve wasted being jerked around by
Telus.
It’s now 9:30 am BC time—10:30
am Telus (AB) time. Obviously Ms.
Anderson must be fairly high up in
Telus, because she’s not exactly get-
ting a wiggle on to get back to little
ol’ me, is she? Actually—ir’s now
llam two days later—I’ve aged a
year in the interval (my birthday was
Monday). I’ve left a new message
telling Ms. A. that she can call me
tomorrow whenever she gets in.
Thursday March 25: Triumph! I
have conquered the monster Telus
Corporation!
Having not heard back from Ms.
Anderson in several days I called
again today. She answered her own
phone. I explained exactly what had
taken place, and quoted the words
of the Telus rep I'd talked to earlier,
“It would be illegal” to refund me
my $63. Instead of temporizing,
Ms. Anderson responded with, “It
isn't, of course. That person total-
yan
In a warm rush of good feeling, I
spared her having to say, “lied.” Ms.
Anderson explained that I was not
entitled to a refund for defective
service (which I have admitted
before). I stated that I did not seek
the refund for that reason—I just
wanted Darren Entwistle to return
one twelfth of the $756 I was
charged for what the “president,
CEO, and proud member of the
Telus team” himself called “substan-
dard service” over the last year.
“Each customer has to be looked
at as an individual,” I was told
(which I assume is code for “the
squeaky wheel gets the grease”). Ms.
Anderson has said that she will
refund my money by the goodwill
credit mechanism—built into Telus
for exactly these sorts of cases. The
$63 will be subtracted from my next
bill. It truly restores my faith in the
company to know that basically, any
sufficiently pissed-off customer can
get their money back from Telus at
Telus’ discretion. Provided they're
willing to write a few letters.
Will there be a fifth “Dear Telus”
installment? I get my next bill
around the April 10. I'd ding them
for the time I’ve spent being talked
to, and sometimes grossly lied to, by
them, for the time writing to the
CRTC, and for the hours I spent
writing letters and OP pieces. But
$63 is 36 beers. What the hell, it’s a
victory, and for the most part—it’s
been fun!
Apply now at
Centre for more
information.
Come tutor at the
LEARNING
CENTRE!
We are looking for people like
you to join our team
for the Summer
Semester starting in May.
www.workopoliscampus.com,
and come by The Learning
YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!
bf of"
http://www.otherpress.ca ¢ Page 9
fipril 7, 2004
Opinions ¢ the other press ©
Dear Telus: What A &
Tangled Web We Weave
LIKE WORKING
WITH PEOPLE?
yo ee
CT RING
x fo
oe
Do you have a 3.0
average and desire
to help other students
do well in their courses?
Do you want to work
ina dynamic, flexible
environment that is
in the same building
as your classes?
Ted Morrison
OP. Contributor
Well, well, well, me hearties. Let's
sum up the action taken on Telus so
far.
November 2003: I ask the Telus
online directory for all entries in
their category “Musical Instrument
Shops” within 200km of Vancouver.
The directory responds, informing
me that there are none. I beg to dif-
fer, in writing, to the complaints
department via the email link on
Telus’ own web page.
November 2003 + a day or two:
Into my inbox comes my complaint
letter to Telus—not answered, but
bounced. That is, the complaint let-
ter I sent Telus, from a Telus page,
was bounced by a Telus server as
“address unrecognized.” I laugh hol-
lowly and write the first “Dear
Telus” piece.
January 2004: Upon my arrival
home from Xmas holidays, I discov-
er that the chairman of Telus has
included in the envelope containing
my monthly bill, a sincere letter, full
of shame and pain, about the lousy
service Telus customers have been
receiving. Feeling Mr. Entwistle’s
pain, I write hima letter explaining
that he can expiate his guilt by sim-
ply returning $63 (about one
month's worth of my phone bill) to
me at the above address, and thank-
ing him for the depth and sincerity
of his contrition. This experience I
incorporate into “Dear Telus”
episode II.
February 2004: Mr. Entwistle has
a friendly fellow from the Telus head
office call me. This nice guy explains
how they'd love to refund my
dough, but it’s illegal, due to regula-
tions put in place by Big Brother—I
mean the CRTC.
About the same time: I write to
the CRTC to let them know their
foul ruse has been discovered. A very
nice lady writes me back the follow-
ing day, asking for clarification.
After explaining the situation in
complete and utter honesty (I’m
asking for a refund not because my
service has been any shittier than the
usual Telus standard, but because
they say they're so very sorry with-
out really meaning it), I get a mes-
sage from the CRTC stating that
there is no reason why Telus cannot
issue me a refund “for any amount,
including $63” or for any reason.
This information is loyally compiled
into “Dear Telus” mark III.
March 2004: I write back to Mr.
Entwistle, asking him to quote me
the chapter and verse wherein the
bad ol’ CRTC says I can’t have my
refund—which brings us to the
most recent happening. On March
18 I got a phone message from one
Bonnie Anderson at Telus corporate
HQ. Ms. Anderson, understandably
not familiar with my case, apparent-
ly read my letter and concluded,
“Tm not sure what you're asking
for.”
It’s like this, Ms. A: I am asking
for my $63 back. Failing that, I
want you to show me where it is
written down that Telus cannot,
nay—must not, give me this refund.
I placed a call to the Alberta head-
quarters of Telus today—but it turns
out Ms. A only gets in at 10am. So I
left a message. Privately I’ve decided
that if they stall me again this time,
I will up my demand to $126. That's
a lot less than the value of the time
I’ve wasted being jerked around by
Telus.
It’s now 9:30 am BC time—10:30
am Telus (AB) time. Obviously Ms.
Anderson must be fairly high up in
Telus, because she’s not exactly get-
ting a wiggle on to get back to little
ol’ me, is she? Actually—ir’s now
llam two days later—I’ve aged a
year in the interval (my birthday was
Monday). I’ve left a new message
telling Ms. A. that she can call me
tomorrow whenever she gets in.
Thursday March 25: Triumph! I
have conquered the monster Telus
Corporation!
Having not heard back from Ms.
Anderson in several days I called
again today. She answered her own
phone. I explained exactly what had
taken place, and quoted the words
of the Telus rep I'd talked to earlier,
“It would be illegal” to refund me
my $63. Instead of temporizing,
Ms. Anderson responded with, “It
isn't, of course. That person total-
yan
In a warm rush of good feeling, I
spared her having to say, “lied.” Ms.
Anderson explained that I was not
entitled to a refund for defective
service (which I have admitted
before). I stated that I did not seek
the refund for that reason—I just
wanted Darren Entwistle to return
one twelfth of the $756 I was
charged for what the “president,
CEO, and proud member of the
Telus team” himself called “substan-
dard service” over the last year.
“Each customer has to be looked
at as an individual,” I was told
(which I assume is code for “the
squeaky wheel gets the grease”). Ms.
Anderson has said that she will
refund my money by the goodwill
credit mechanism—built into Telus
for exactly these sorts of cases. The
$63 will be subtracted from my next
bill. It truly restores my faith in the
company to know that basically, any
sufficiently pissed-off customer can
get their money back from Telus at
Telus’ discretion. Provided they're
willing to write a few letters.
Will there be a fifth “Dear Telus”
installment? I get my next bill
around the April 10. I'd ding them
for the time I’ve spent being talked
to, and sometimes grossly lied to, by
them, for the time writing to the
CRTC, and for the hours I spent
writing letters and OP pieces. But
$63 is 36 beers. What the hell, it’s a
victory, and for the most part—it’s
been fun!
Apply now at
Centre for more
information.
Come tutor at the
LEARNING
CENTRE!
We are looking for people like
you to join our team
for the Summer
Semester starting in May.
www.workopoliscampus.com,
and come by The Learning
YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!
bf of"
http://www.otherpress.ca ¢ Page 9
fipril 7, 2004
Opinions ¢ the other press ©
Dear Telus: What A &
Tangled Web We Weave
LIKE WORKING
WITH PEOPLE?
yo ee
CT RING
x fo
oe
Do you have a 3.0
average and desire
to help other students
do well in their courses?
Do you want to work
ina dynamic, flexible
environment that is
in the same building
as your classes?
Ted Morrison
OP. Contributor
Well, well, well, me hearties. Let's
sum up the action taken on Telus so
far.
November 2003: I ask the Telus
online directory for all entries in
their category “Musical Instrument
Shops” within 200km of Vancouver.
The directory responds, informing
me that there are none. I beg to dif-
fer, in writing, to the complaints
department via the email link on
Telus’ own web page.
November 2003 + a day or two:
Into my inbox comes my complaint
letter to Telus—not answered, but
bounced. That is, the complaint let-
ter I sent Telus, from a Telus page,
was bounced by a Telus server as
“address unrecognized.” I laugh hol-
lowly and write the first “Dear
Telus” piece.
January 2004: Upon my arrival
home from Xmas holidays, I discov-
er that the chairman of Telus has
included in the envelope containing
my monthly bill, a sincere letter, full
of shame and pain, about the lousy
service Telus customers have been
receiving. Feeling Mr. Entwistle’s
pain, I write hima letter explaining
that he can expiate his guilt by sim-
ply returning $63 (about one
month's worth of my phone bill) to
me at the above address, and thank-
ing him for the depth and sincerity
of his contrition. This experience I
incorporate into “Dear Telus”
episode II.
February 2004: Mr. Entwistle has
a friendly fellow from the Telus head
office call me. This nice guy explains
how they'd love to refund my
dough, but it’s illegal, due to regula-
tions put in place by Big Brother—I
mean the CRTC.
About the same time: I write to
the CRTC to let them know their
foul ruse has been discovered. A very
nice lady writes me back the follow-
ing day, asking for clarification.
After explaining the situation in
complete and utter honesty (I’m
asking for a refund not because my
service has been any shittier than the
usual Telus standard, but because
they say they're so very sorry with-
out really meaning it), I get a mes-
sage from the CRTC stating that
there is no reason why Telus cannot
issue me a refund “for any amount,
including $63” or for any reason.
This information is loyally compiled
into “Dear Telus” mark III.
March 2004: I write back to Mr.
Entwistle, asking him to quote me
the chapter and verse wherein the
bad ol’ CRTC says I can’t have my
refund—which brings us to the
most recent happening. On March
18 I got a phone message from one
Bonnie Anderson at Telus corporate
HQ. Ms. Anderson, understandably
not familiar with my case, apparent-
ly read my letter and concluded,
“Tm not sure what you're asking
for.”
It’s like this, Ms. A: I am asking
for my $63 back. Failing that, I
want you to show me where it is
written down that Telus cannot,
nay—must not, give me this refund.
I placed a call to the Alberta head-
quarters of Telus today—but it turns
out Ms. A only gets in at 10am. So I
left a message. Privately I’ve decided
that if they stall me again this time,
I will up my demand to $126. That's
a lot less than the value of the time
I’ve wasted being jerked around by
Telus.
It’s now 9:30 am BC time—10:30
am Telus (AB) time. Obviously Ms.
Anderson must be fairly high up in
Telus, because she’s not exactly get-
ting a wiggle on to get back to little
ol’ me, is she? Actually—ir’s now
llam two days later—I’ve aged a
year in the interval (my birthday was
Monday). I’ve left a new message
telling Ms. A. that she can call me
tomorrow whenever she gets in.
Thursday March 25: Triumph! I
have conquered the monster Telus
Corporation!
Having not heard back from Ms.
Anderson in several days I called
again today. She answered her own
phone. I explained exactly what had
taken place, and quoted the words
of the Telus rep I'd talked to earlier,
“It would be illegal” to refund me
my $63. Instead of temporizing,
Ms. Anderson responded with, “It
isn't, of course. That person total-
yan
In a warm rush of good feeling, I
spared her having to say, “lied.” Ms.
Anderson explained that I was not
entitled to a refund for defective
service (which I have admitted
before). I stated that I did not seek
the refund for that reason—I just
wanted Darren Entwistle to return
one twelfth of the $756 I was
charged for what the “president,
CEO, and proud member of the
Telus team” himself called “substan-
dard service” over the last year.
“Each customer has to be looked
at as an individual,” I was told
(which I assume is code for “the
squeaky wheel gets the grease”). Ms.
Anderson has said that she will
refund my money by the goodwill
credit mechanism—built into Telus
for exactly these sorts of cases. The
$63 will be subtracted from my next
bill. It truly restores my faith in the
company to know that basically, any
sufficiently pissed-off customer can
get their money back from Telus at
Telus’ discretion. Provided they're
willing to write a few letters.
Will there be a fifth “Dear Telus”
installment? I get my next bill
around the April 10. I'd ding them
for the time I’ve spent being talked
to, and sometimes grossly lied to, by
them, for the time writing to the
CRTC, and for the hours I spent
writing letters and OP pieces. But
$63 is 36 beers. What the hell, it’s a
victory, and for the most part—it’s
been fun!
Apply now at
Centre for more
information.
Come tutor at the
LEARNING
CENTRE!
We are looking for people like
you to join our team
for the Summer
Semester starting in May.
www.workopoliscampus.com,
and come by The Learning
YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!
bf of"
http://www.otherpress.ca ¢ Page 9